Last month it was my 22nd birthday. I complained the last couple of birthdays that my mom never did anything special for me. This year I complained to my sisters that I was pretty sure mom was not going to do anything special for me this year as well. The day before my birthday, my mom asked what I was going to do to celebrate my birthday. My response to her was, “I don’t want to do anything, it is not like we ever do anything special on my birthday anyway”. I had always felt that if I wanted to do something for my birthday, I had to plan it myself. I made her feel really bad and I could tell she was a little down by the tone of her voice. That same day, I came home to a very big home cooked meal and my sister who came from out of town was there as well. I felt really bad in saying my mom puts no effort into my birthday.
There have been times when my mom gets upset when a chore around the house has not been done. One day she was very upset to know that the bathrooms had not been cleaned when she arrived home from work. What was clean was the kitchen. As she was yelling she asked, “Who cleaned the kitchen?” Not knowing if he did it or not I answered “Francisco”, who is my step dad. It turns out he did clean the kitchen and good thing he did because if that wasn’t clean along with the bathrooms, my mom would have been mad the whole day.
First off, Happy Belated Birthday!!! I know how you feel when no one does anything special for you on your birthday, and all you want is just a little something special that you don’t do everyday. I can’t imagine how you felt after you told your mom that, then seeing your mom’s reaction and hearing her voice. Like on hand you might be relieved that you finally said how you felt, then on the other hand you feel bad for making your mother upset or sad. I think its super nice and awesome that your mom put together a home cooked meal for you and your sister came from out of town to have dinner as a family for your birthday. I bet that made it for a special birthday. Great post!
ReplyDeleteAHHHH I understand that situation so much! My family is actually really laid back for the most part and birthdays are always just birthdays. The same situation happened with my brother and I couldn’t imagine that feeling when you said something to your mom. I would hate to have deal with that. Even though you really didn’t do anything wrong, it’s just a discomforting feeling. I am glad everything worked out for your birthday though! Home cooked meals are an all-time favorite for me! I would rather have that and family than a bunch of gifts! It feels good when surprises actually work out!
ReplyDeleteHey Stephanie325,
ReplyDeleteWell for starters, I am glad to hear your birthday turned out better than the previous ones! Enjoy being 22! I definitely know how you felt after your mom proved you wrong. I have similar situations with my mom because I live at home as well. She is rarely ever home for dinner, and therefore I am very used to cooking for myself and only myself. If she ever asks about what I am doing that night I ask her why and say its not like she is going to be home. I think I need to keep in mind that she has a lot to handle at work, and I am sure if she could she would spend more dinner times with me.
I think this is so important to point out, I think its very interesting how you being used to consistancy as far as you not doing anything for your birthday or expecting anything allowed you to be accustom, and in turn it cause you to make and assumption that in turn hurt your mother. I think that for us these days we must live life without expectancies, because all it does sometimes is lead to disappointment, and distress. I think that in your case, its ok and it happens, just as long as you apologized for in a sense being a bit rude. Good Post.
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