Chapter 8, queston 3

                Anger-outs and anger –ins both have their site affects. In my family I feel like anger-outs is hereditary. We all lash out at each other whenever we are angry. My mom is a perfect example of someone who uses anger-out. When she is angry about the kitchen or bathroom being dirty, she starts to yell out of nowhere which creates a lot of tension between her and people who live in the household.  While learning different techniques on how to communicate, I stopped responding to her lash outs and started to observe her. While I observed her yelling at my stepdad for not washing the dishes, I thought of a way to help her communicate better. After she was done yelling at him, I calmly asked her if she thought there was a better way to get her message across without yelling. She thought about it for a moment and realized there was no need for such a dramatic reaction. Now, she tells me to kindly point out to her when she is going back to her old habits.

Chapter 8, Question 2

                Chapter 8 focuses on how people react to anger. Everyone acts differently when they are angry and that is why sometimes people may clash.  I do not lean more towards anger-out or anger-ins, I am a bit of both. When it comes to family, I am a person who uses anger-outs. The reason for that is because I am more comfortable with my family than the outside world. I am not proud to say but when I do blow up, it upsets people and it causes whoever I am angry and I to not communicate for a while. When I am at work, I am someone who uses anger-in. Because I try to keep a professional image, I am low key and try not to say anything at all. Although I do not say anything, I tend to keep my anger all inside which causes a distance between the people I am angry at and I. That sometimes leads to unwanted issues at work.

Chapter 7 Question 1

In order to maintain a healthy balance between school, work, and social life, there has to be a middle ground. In chapter seven, we read about the three solutions to help us as humans to sustain a stress-free lifestyle. The first solution is work and play. The chapter expresses how saving time to do effortless activities can help ease one’s mind. For me, playing a couple of games on my phone in between homework breaks helps to let my mind drift off into a free world. The second solution suggests finding joy in school and work. I could apply this to my life by finding a major I really love or a job that I really enjoy. This way, the day is something to look forward to instead of becoming dreadful. Last but not least we have the third solution which consists of finding joy and pain in what we do. For example, there is a lot of pain in studying for a midterm although; the joy of it is receiving a good grade. The three solutions can reduce everyday stress and help us to live a happier life.

Chapter 6, question 3

Trust in a relationship is sacred.  It is a common binding factor and produces a sense of security. When trust is the core of one’s relationships, the relationship is successful. Trust is important not only in a relationship between a man and a woman but also between children and parents, coworkers and friendships. In my previous relationship, I had complete trust for my significant other although; it did not stay that way. We both started the relationship on a solid ground of trust. I never had to worry about where he was or who he was with. One day we went to dinner and I was texting someone on his phone. After I was done texting, the rest of his messages showed up. I seen that he had messaged another girl and they had planned a night out together. After I see his text message, I was never able to have full trust in him again. It was the beginning of a failed relationship.  

Chapter 6, Question 2

Being in an unbalanced relationship is very unhealthy. An unbalanced relationship feels like the job you never want to go to. I have been in a relationship where I have had the power but, I have also experienced the flip side of having less power as well. When I had the power in my previous relationship, almost anything I said went my way. Although most decisions were made by me, I did not only consider my feelings. My decisions were based off what I thought was best for my boyfriend and I. When I thought he was wrong about something, I would briefly discuss to him why I thought his decision was wrong. When I had less power in the relationship, I felt like I had a third parent. I was always nagged at and could not do whatever I wanted without notifying my significant other. I felt so horrible that all I wanted was out of the relationship and I did just that.

Chapter 6, Question 1

I take trust very seriously.  It takes a lot for me to have %100 percent trust in someone that is why I value trust so much. One person I lost trust for is my friend from work. We once had a very close friendship. We would call each other various times a week and have two hour long phone conversations. I would tell her almost everything. Eventually, I ended up working under her at our counter. As soon as she took over the counter, I began to hear from her boyfriend and several other people whom she was close to, that she wanted to get me fired. After I heard that, management told me what she said behind my back and I was devastated. I lost complete trust in her and couldn’t believe she had gone behind my back and talked badly about me. After I had heard all the bad comments that she had made, I became very distant. When she would ask me a question, I would give her short answers. When she would ask me a personal question, I would change the subject. Unfortunately, I was never able to trust her and we no longer have a friendship.